The Trump Effect

One of the first cousins of my first cousin has a pet political theory that making voting mandatory would greatly improve Democracy… he thinks that if more people would vote, demagogues like Donald Trump would be less likely to arise.

The problem with that theory is that (a) there are always more ignorant and stupid people than there are intelligent and informed ones, and (b) Americans are getting dumber & dumber every day.

And if you think that isn’t true, it’s only because you’re an ill-informed American.
[Witness: it’s only mid-August, and 27 US idiots have already roasted their kids to death in cars this year. That’s down from the all-time high of 49 in 2010, but still and all, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out you shouldn’t leave a kid in a hot car… yet only 20 of the fifty states have laws on the books making it illegal, and despite what Republicans may believe, it’s not getting any cooler.]

So I think (c) should be pretty obvious: if you can’t get 3/5ths of state politicians to pass a law making it illegal to cook your kids, then how are you ever going to get a federal mandate to obligate people to go out and vote?

It may sound good in theory – but Donald Trump sounds good, in theory.

“I’m gonna build a wall!” A simple plan, for simple-minded people. Just like all his ‘ideas’ – if they can be labeled as such; Donald doesn’t have any real ideas (or ideals) – he just has knee-jerk reactions. He’s like an amoeba: if it fits in your mouth, swallow it. If it doesn’t, spit it out & go move on to something else.

He’s gonna make a great President. And after he’s been elected, I’m gonna go get high & stay that way. (Which is saying a lot for a former stoner, who’s been clean for over 40 years.) Because the only way a Trump presidency will be endurable is if you’re loaded to the gills.

Or stupid as a rock, which most of his followers are. How do I know that? Because Trumpites can’t figure out that walls not only keep people out, they also keep people in… go ask Jim Jones’ followers about their stockade in Jonestown, Guyana. Oh, that’s right – you can’t. They’re all dead.

“Gotta build that wall” to keep out all those illegal aliens… all those dirty brown Mexicans coming across the southern border. And all those dusky brown Islamic Fundamentalist Terrorists coming across the Atlantic and Pacific oceans every day, to create mayhem & disorder in the good old US of A… gonna build up a real good force of border guards, too, to stand guard on that wall. And hunt down the millions of illegal brown people who have already sneaked in, and are busy stealing our precious bodily fluids…

Yeah, Trump’s the Man. He’s the White Man, without a plan, making one last stand. He’s the Kool-aid Man, gonna make America great again, by walling it in & issuing mandatory federal ID cards & making all citizens carry one around wherever they may go…

especially when they go to vote.


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